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Now that Ciara and Russell Wilson have tied the knot and are expecting their first child together (she also has a son with ex-fiance, Future), she’s back at rehashing their abstinence love story.

Ciara said in a new interview with Cosmopolitan South Africa that they chose abstinence because, “You shouldn’t feel like you have to give your body away to get someone to like you.”

In the February issue, the singer explains:

“I really believe that when you focus on a friendship, you have the opportunity to build a strong foundation for a relationship—and once you know you’re really great friends and you’re what we call ‘equally yoked,’ where you share the same values or the same outlook on life, it kind of sets the tone. Knowing that you’ll always have the friendship and that you can always go back to it is very important, and very powerful.”

A big part of building that friendship was not having sex — a story Ciara has shared too many times before. This time with Cosmo, she explains why that decision was vital in helping them build a friendship first.

“We women think with our hearts and with our minds. When we see a guy, we envision what he’s like and whether this could be something special. Guys see us from an exterior point of view—that’s something I learnt along the way as a woman.

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“It’s important to have a friendship. It’s important to have standards,” she added. “You shouldn’t feel like you have to give your body away to get someone to like you.”

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She also reveals that refraining from sex was actually the idea of her devout Christian quarterback husband.

“I have to give credit to my husband for sharing those views,” Ciara explained. “It’s awesome how it all worked out.”

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