i wrote these poems and looking for feedback. please comment suggestions on how i can make them better.

(when typing the lines often where to long, so i put parentheses around the lines that went over one line on this but are one line.)

twins

(we have shared everything)
since before birth.
never just one,
forever known as two.

we will never know the joy
(of having our own birthday,)
for it will always be shared

(years later they will realize,)
we they once compared
(are different as summer and winter. theyll see)
(different people standing before them)
not the same person
they all expect us to be.


skittles

“i love you” i said
(“happy birthday and merry christmas”)
“i will miss you”

he mumbled a reply
(he tried his best, that i know for sure)
(“i love you” is what i'm sure he said)

(through the tears, i smiled back)
(not wanting him to see my pain)
(it was nothing compared to his)

(i put my hand on his, still holding back the tears)
(he was fighting hard, but it wasn't enough)
(i said goodbye once more and left the room)

(i went upstairs where everyone was sitting silent)
all doing as i was,
holding back the tears

(then after what felt like hours we had to go)
(the weight was to much, i was just a kid)
(i went downstairs and said my last goodbye)

(i went out the door with a heavy heart knowing it could be the last thing i say)
(“skittles” i said pointing to a parked car)
(he looks, smiles, and mumbles what i know to be “skittles”)

(i walk past the yellow car and think back to happier times)
(i climb into my dads truck, leaving my mom with her dad)
still silent, we pulled away

(i had fun with my cousins trying to forget about everything,)
but i can't
(i know it happened as soon as my dad answered the call.)

(still fighting back the tears, i smile and continue our game)
we left soon after
i knew what was coming

(we walked back into that door)
(into that room with an empty bed)
(my moms greets us and tells us what happened)

(it breaks my heart but still i smile through the pain)
(it's okay i thought, he's no longer suffering)
i kept telling myself that

(the rest of break was a blur)
i only cried at night
(i could not break my moms heart even more)


always

soon the door will close
on promises.
forever and always
will no longer prevail,
just give it time.

(relations once cherished and loved)
(will not last on a promise of always.)
(they will get ripped apart and go their separate ways.)

you will never be ready.
(the always you once believed,)
(will prove to come to an end. )

(the importance lies not in the promise, )
but in the memories.
hold on to them -
before it takes again.

thank you :)
i hope you like them